A strange thing has come over me. Everytime I see a ring on another woman's finger, in particular, a younger woman, I'm overtaken with rage and find myself muttering, 'stupid bitch.' I'm getting old and increasingly frightened that I will never find somebody of my own.
My married friends do not understand. 'Marriage is not all sweetness and light,' they tell me. I tell them, 'I understand that, but you have seasons of knowing that the person's got your back. As for me, it's all down to me and just once in a while, I just want someone to fuss over me. For a day. 5 minutes. 1 week. Whatever.'
The other day, I received some amazing news and realised I didn't have anybody to share it with. I told my family which was great but I wanted to tell a special someone and oh look, there's noone there.
It's worse in church. All those dating, courting and marriage books written by self-righteous and sanctified women with no idea of the peculiar dynamics of dating in the 21st century. I have never been to a singles conference and I refuse to go to one for much the same reason.
Lessons of life
I was hanging out with some gals the other day. One of them wondered if she would ever find someone. I told her that if that was her heart's desire, then there was no reason why God wouldn't grant it to her. If truth be known, I didn't believe a word of what I said. But hey, that's my problem not hers.
How did I get here? It wasn't meant to be like this.
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1 comment:
I think you feel you already know it all and you are too proud, that's why you don't go to singles conferences. The truth is, my dear, you don't know it all, and you are missing out on knowledge that could be important to you. I belong to a wonderful singles ministry at Trinity Chapel and you are welcome to join us!
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